Finding Closure


Author: T'Lin ( )

Series: TOS

Code: U

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Four years have passed since Jim Kirk was lost and presumed dead ... Uhura writes him a letter, as her way of saying goodbye.

Disclaimer: STAR TREK belongs to Paramount/Viacom ... I do not intend to infringe upon their copyright. I write for the pleasure it brings me, and hopefully, to entertain. I make no money off of my efforts. Although the characters are not my own, this original story is ... T'Lin, July 2001

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by T'Lin - 0107.21

Dear Jim,

Strange, isn't it, that I would choose to write to you, as if you were able to read this. After all, it has been four years since your disappearance, and of course, the assumption is that you have died. I think that everyone has come to terms with your death, except, perhaps, for Spock ... but even he is moving on, as they say. I suppose this is my way of finding closure, so that I, too, may move on.

There are so many things that you and I never talked about ... I often wonder if you realize just how important you were to me, and how much I valued your friendship. For nearly thirty years, we worked together ... shared the joys of exploration, and the sadness of loss ... the excitement of new discoveries, and the tedium of the mundane ... in fact, a full spectrum of experiences.

Yet not once, in all those years, did I say to you, 'congratulations' on your partnership with Spock. I know that, for professional reasons, you wanted it kept private, and I always respected that ... but recently, it has come to my attention, that perhaps you didn't know that I even knew about it ... or perhaps you though I knew, but did not approve, so kept my opinions to myself.

I assure you, I did indeed know that you were lovers ... and I heartily approved. The two of you were good for each other ... you balanced one another ... your strengths and weaknesses complimented one another perfectly. You were the most perfect example of 'soul mates' I have ever seen, yet so few knew the truth about your relationship.

I have had one person, sharing my life, with love and joy for nearly thirty years ... Scotty and I have been blessed ... but no matter how well attuned we are to one another, it was nothing compared to the affinity you two had. In some ways, I envy that affinity, for it makes the camaraderie I share with Scotty seem like mere friendship in comparison.

Of course, as the years passed, I noticed how McCoy had also become an integral part of your lives, adding a bit of a challenge to spice things up, as it were ... I guess it is only fitting that now he and Spock are together. Their relationship may not be as 'perfect' as yours was, but it works for them.

We all deserve happiness in our lives ... especially after something happens to make us think we never will again. Death, of course, is inevitable ... and in our line of work, sudden death happens far more frequently than we would like. It is hard on those who remain, but preferable to a man like you, I should think.

As I write this to you, I realize that I have made the same mistake with Spock and Len as I did with you and Spock ... I must remedy that as soon as possible, for they deserve to know how delighted I am that they are together and happy.

With love and gratitude for all your years of friendship, I bid you a final goodbye,